Timmy at 2 1/2

This little man has a huge personality.  He has a lot to say and he is less content all the time with being the little brother along for the ride.  Case in point: yesterday while Delaney and Annie were at school and it was a cold gloomy day, I decided to take Timmy to open play at the gymnastics place his sisters go to.  On the way there, I could tell he didn't understand what he was going to do there, as he just associates gymnastics with being the place where he has to pass time with me in a waiting area while the girls take their classes.  Finally it dawned on him and he said, "Timmy go in the door?"  I said, "Yes, you get to go in the door and climb on the stuff and play!"  He sighed, "Yaayyy!" like it was the best news he'd heard in awhile.  He had such a blast and I was glad to have something like that to take him to on such a crappy day.  And I also realized that the next time I have him in the waiting room with me while the girls are in class, it's going to be a little harder to keep him happy.  But oh well..  He has also mentioned on more than one occasion that he wants to go to school.  I considered putting him in the 2-year-old class at Annie's school, but in the end Tim and I decided against it.  Two-year-old preschool is kind of a waste of money for one thing, although it might be warranted in some cases; and besides, I can do things with him that he'd get to do at school.  (and it won't cost $160 a month.)  I've started taking him to 'Time out for Toddlers' at the library on Friday mornings, where he gets to listen to stories, sing songs and watch puppets with other kids his age.  There are plenty of things like that to do around here, but mostly I think he just wants to be around other kids and play in an unstructured environment.  He gets to do that at the Y.  I think that's what he thinks school is, anyway.  Or maybe he just wants to be included in something his sisters are doing -- that's the real reason he wants to go to school, I think.  He wants to do every little thing they do.  I have already looked into preschools in SC for him next year, but I'm not even sure I want to send him yet.  I like to gather the information and then sit on it until I decide what I really want to do.

He communicates so well with us now, and I just love hearing all the words that come out of him.  He's been talking full sentences for months now, but occasionally the words get a little scrambled.  I asked him what a fish says once, and he said, "No fish say nuffing."  Another time Tim told him he was a big baby, and Timmy replied indignantly, "No me big baby."  I realized not long ago that I hadn't been taking any videos of the adorable way he talks right now.  This morning I had him all to myself while Tim was at a parade with the girls.  I took video after video of him talking as he did different things.  I know I will always be glad I did.  I will share one here for any grandparents or aunts who want to watch.:)

Tim gives him a hard time sometimes for being a baby because he thinks it's his job as a dad to "toughen him up."  He pouts, whines and cries over a lot of things -- fights with his sisters, hearing the word "no," and careening into walls or furniture a little too hard.  Tim is annoyed at Timmy's tears and says, "He's such a big baby."  I say, "He is, quite literally, a big baby.  He's 2!"

Lest you think Tim is immune to his charms, a few days ago I watched the most precious scene unfold between the two of them.  They were watching snowboarding on TV, and Tim told Timmy to ask me if he could go snowboarding.  Timmy said to me, "Timmy go no-bird?"  Having not heard the preceding conversation, I was like, "What?"  I made him repeat it a couple more times, and Tim finally told me, "Snowboard."  I snickered, like "Sure, you want to go snowboarding."  Then for some reason Timmy beckoned his dad to come down to his level so he could tell him a "secret."  Tim hunkered down next to Timmy, who then took his dad's ear in one hand and chin in the other to pull him closer so he could whisper in his ear.  I could see on Tim's face that he was completely melting inside, and who wouldn't be, with those tiny hands on your face and that little voice whispering in your ear?

He is still in a crib, and it's looking like he will be until we move this summer.  I am happy with him in the crib, and I think it's funny that, climber that he is, he has not thought to try to climb out yet.  I think he likes being there, in that cozy enclosed space.  Right now the plan is just to move to the next house and when we set up his bed, set it up as a toddler bed.  But then again, maybe we should convert the bed in the next couple months so he doesn't have quite so much change to deal with at once..?  I just hate to mess with anything that's working well, and I don't want him roaming his room during naps and at night.  I like him contained.  I will just procrastinate that decision a while longer.  I'll put toddler bed up on the shelf next to potty-training, because I can't decide when to try that either.  Those two things might have to happen around the same time because he'll need to be able to get out of bed to use the potty.

I've noticed that his attention span is getting longer, and I no longer have to be so quick to say, "Put everything away because Timmy's coming!"  Not long ago he played a board game with us -- "Hi ho Cherry-o".  It was the first time ever.  He played with us until the game's completion, obediently putting apples in his basket or back on the tree.  It was so much fun for me to get to play a game with all three of them.  He plays lengthy games of pretend with his sisters, the current favorite being "Patch the Puppy Prince."  They pretend to be a family of royalty: they are the queen and princess, I am the cook, Tim's the butler, and the star, Prince Patch.  He yaps and barks and crawls obediently after them all over the house.  And he gives everyone puppy kisses.  I tell him, "Patch, you're the best puppy ever!" I think I like that game the best.

Sometimes he does inexplicably mean things like hitting his sisters on the head with toys or crashing into them with his cozy coupe while they're trying to ride their bikes.  I had to put his toy hammer out of reach indefinitely because no matter how many timeouts he got, or how many times he said he was sorry, he just couldn't get it through his heads that hammers are for nails, not people's heads.  What it is, we think, is that he hasn't learned to distinguish the line between having fun and hurting people.  When Tim is roughhousing with the three of them and Timmy is pinned to the floor, he panics and shrieks loudly to be freed.  As soon as he's free he runs right back into the fray.  It's easy to see how the line between having fun and being mean could get blurry.  Eventually he'll figure it out but his sisters shouldn't turn their backs on him until he does.

His sisters love him so much when he's not clobbering them with toys.  When Annie goes in to see him when he's up for his nap, he'll keep asking her for things and she'll keep bringing them.  They love hearing the funny things he says in his cute little voice, and he delights in the nonsensical potty humor that sends them into peals of giggles.  He can be pesky at times when he comes bumbling into the midst of their little games, but then there are the magical times when they include him and they have fun together.  It makes me smile to see how smitten they are by him.

He is a hardheaded boy and he constantly tests his limits.  Sometimes I think he wakes up in the morning and says to himself, "Today is the day I wear Mama down."  And we do everything the hard way, all day long.  But he is my little buddy and I do love him so.  It makes me so happy to just look at him.

This and that

At this point in the day, a little after 1, when the kids are having naptime/ quiet time, that's when my brain wants to shut down too.  But today I'm determined that it won't because this is my blogging time, and the only time I have lately for it.  I've got my coffee next to me, and I'm going to see if I can't throw together some kind of summer update.  I've been starting and stopping a lot with this post, even though I have all kinds of things to talk about.  Maybe I'm feeling a little discouraged about it.  Sometimes I forget my whole purpose in starting it in the first place -- it's not to showcase my extraordinary writing talent (*eye roll*), but really just a way that I can take snapshots of our life from time to time, that I will get to have forever and pass on to the kids.  A living scrapbook and journal, I guess.  The secondary but also very important purpose, is to give our geographically distant family and friends a window into our lives, and to allow them to watch the kids grow and change along with us.  Those were my two reasons for starting this thing in the first place, but another beautiful thing that has emerged is what it does just for me.  It allows me to step back and take a look at us and be like, 'You know what, we have a great life.  We have a lot to be thankful for.  It may feel like bumbling but we are doing a pretty good job of raising this family, loving each other and making the most of what we're given.'  I love the perspective it gives me.  Over the four years I've been doing this, I've also eagerly followed the blogs of my friends.  I'm sure they had some of the same reasons as me for starting theirs, but I've seen so many of them fall by the wayside.  It makes me sad, but I do understand that there are a limited number of hours in the day and so very many things to do in those precious few hours that we get to decide what to do with.  I don't know where the inspiration is coming from to make me keep coming back, but I know that it is just as much a gift to myself as the occasional pedicure or working out and eating healthy.

Sometimes the perfectionist in me gets so caught up in looking for ways to improve, trying to find just the right way to say something, and worst of all, criticizing and nitpicking everything I've ever written here.  When I hold myself to some unattainable standard of perfection, I find myself coming up short in all kinds of ways, but most of all just feeling so bland, ordinary and uninteresting.  And cheesy.  Like, why would anyone want to read this crap?  But I know better than that.  I know what a horrible waste of time it is to think that way.  I've said it before but I really need to believe it -- the handful of people who love me/us (or at least like us a lot) will love this, and those who don't aren't even reading.  There's nobody to impress.

So here goes..

This week is the last typical week of summer for us, and not only that, but it's our last summer in North Carolina.  Next week we'll be on vacation in Emerald Isle, another lovely spot close by to where we live. Nothing like arriving at your destination after less than an hour, with a car full of groceries!  Delaney will start school the Monday after we get back.  It makes me sad to think of this being the last summer here.  I'm a creature of habit, and the daily habit of working out and then taking the kids to the pool can't be beat, in my opinion.  Now that Tim's home, I don't even have to fit in a big grocery trip -- Tim goes to the commissary for me, and all I have to do is make short produce runs a few times a week.  I know that pools and gyms and Ys and fun summers exist in places other than North Carolina, but I can't help but wonder will I like it just as much?  Another thing: how long will it take me to make friends after we move?  All I did the first few months after moving here was complain about how I lived all alone on a suburban island.  Then gradually I got to know some great people, and so many more who are just friendly faces.  As introverted as I am, I love to belong, and I feel like I belong here.  Have I learned any lessons so as to avoid the pain of getting to this point in whatever location we find ourselves in next?  That I can't say.  Maybe I will just take it more in stride and understand that I have to go through a fish-out-of-water stage before I settle in.  So my goal for this week has been to keep the cranky to a minimum and take a deep breath when Annie asks me for the umpteenth time, "What are we doing (in the morning?  after naps? next?)", and remember to appreciate the here and now.

The girls are taking swim lessons this week.  Delaney is a pretty strong swimmer, but her freestyle needs a lot of work.  It's like watching myself in the water.  I never could get the hang of that.  I think she enjoys it a lot, and I may have her do another session of lessons in the fall, her and Annie both.  Annie is coming along too.  She can jump in and swim without her floatie but she prefers to have it on most of the time.

Tim has been helping me a lot these past few weeks with getting the girls back into the habit of keeping their beds made, and their room and playroom clean.  I kind of let it all go while he was gone, and just didn't want to bother most of the time.  But it is so important to instill good habits and get them to help out more.  Another thing is, whenever we take them to a store they want this or that, and Tim says, "Where's your money?"  They need an opportunity to earn some because we're not just going to give them an allowance which is money for nothing.  I have heard the argument that you should not be giving kids money for doing the things they're supposed to do around the house anyway, and maybe that is true.  But coming up with any kind of system is so hard and we need to start somewhere.  So this is attempt #3 at a chore chart, and we'll see how long it lasts.  I've made it possible to only earn whole dollar amounts because last time we did this I made every star worth 10 cents.  Then I got annoyed at the end of the week when I had to count out dimes.  Now, if one of them earns 29 stars one week, we'll say, "One more and you could have earned $3.  You'll have to try harder next week."  This will allow them to have their own money to buy the little stuffed animals and other little things they like.  Maybe after we've gotten them used to helping out and then seeing the "fruits of their labors," we can then start to figure out a way to get them to give as well.  But one thing at a time.  

I took Timmy for a haircut last Monday, and it's the most hair he's ever had cut off.  I can't believe how it transformed him to looking like such a bigger boy.  He's so handsome and I love seeing his forehead and ears again.  I had grown rather attached to his shaggy surfer dude look, but this really suits him too.  It must also be so much cooler in the heat, although he doesn't seem to care either way.

Tim calls him "Timmy the Turd", and unfortunately he's said it around the girls and they think it's funny to call him that too.  "TimmytheTurd!" "TimmytheTurd!"  Timmy is rather undisciplined and doesn't like to follow instructions, and sometimes tries to bolt out into the street or across a parking lot.  He can also be whiny and demanding and clingy.  You know why, right?  Because of me, of course.  I raised him that way while Tim was deployed.  Sarcasm aside, there does seem to be a connection between his worst behavior and my presence.  Tim will tell me that while I was gone, he was "Timmy the Terrific!"  As soon as he sees me, he starts to cry and want to be held.  He is so needy that I don't know what to do with him sometimes.  Even just holding him isn't always enough.  He says, "Up, up" and tries to climb higher on me and tighten his arms around my neck.  I don't remember going through this with the girls.  By the time they were his age, there was another baby and they quickly grew accustomed to not being the one I was holding all the time.  It also helped that Tim was home at least a good portion every day for the first couple months of Annie's life, and he and and Delaney got to be good buddies.  Every situation is so different that it's hard to compare.  I don't like to admit this and lend any credence to Tim's opinion, but it may be just be the tiniest bit possible that I foster that neediness in him.  I love to lavish him with affection because he's so darn cute.  Perhaps I spoil him with all the holding.  But I hasten to add that I do tell him no whenever and wherever he needs to be told.  The only thing worse than a two-year-old who is whining and crying to get his way is the two-year-old who knows he can always get his way.  I might be encouraging him to be a mama's boy, but NOT a brat.

I'm going to wrap this up with a few random pictures, seeing as how I've run out of things to say and naptime is over.

The beach is so much more fun with Daddy around.  I believe this was taken the same day he rescued a couple of kids out of the ocean.  It really IS good to have him around.

Fun Friday!

Timmy's 2nd birthday

Timmy's birthday got off to a really icky start, when his sisters came out to the kitchen and reported to me that there was poop in his bed.  I ran back there to see and it turned out to be puke, not poop.  It was everywhere in there -- blanket, sheet, lovey, even in his hair.  So the first item on the agenda was a bath for Timmy, followed by laundry for me.

In spite of having just thrown up all over himself and his bed, he was his chipper self when I brought him out to the kitchen.  He opened his presents from us and ate his breakfast.  

A big Tonka dump truck

Kind of a dumb present, but he loves Elmo so I thought he'd like this.  He did like it, for about 30 seconds.  Not pictured is another gift he liked a lot better -- a package of cars and trucks.  

Tim took Delaney and Timmy to their respective 6-year and 2-year well visits so I could go to PiYo.  I was overjoyed at getting out of a doctor appointment and a double one at that, so that I could do something far more enjoyable.  But why on earth would I schedule the kid's checkup on his birthday?  My only thought at the time I called to schedule had been to make sure he and Delaney could go together as soon as possible after both their birthdays.  Obviously I accomplished that, but I think in the future there should be no more doctor visits on birthdays for the kids.  It's just mean, especially if they're getting shots.  

Tim was exhausted by the time he got home.  He said, "There's a reason why doctor's appointments and dentist and things like that are in YOUR lane."  He said the doctor had asked him confusing questions and there had been a ton of paperwork.  He had offered to do this one for me, but I don't think he'll be volunteering again anytime soon.  That's OK honey, thanks for taking one for the team.:)  Timmy weighed in at 26.8 pounds and 35 inches tall.  He is right around average in both height and weight, still growing along his curve.  He had to get shots too, and when he saw me later he pointed to his thigh and said, "Owie.  Kiss."  I gave him a kiss on his leg, a hug and some ibuprofen.  I said, "It hasn't been much of a birthday for you, huh, Bud?"  Delaney said, "He's having a horrible birthday!  First he had throw up all over his bed and then he had to get shots!"  I said, "Yeah, but he doesn't know any better."  Despite the rough start to his day, he was just as cheerful and loving as ever for the rest of the day.  He doesn't need a perfect birthday to be happy.  He just needs love.  

Birthdays are very minimalist affairs in our family.  A 2-year-old?  He's lucky we even hung up that banner in the kitchen.  After naps he and his sisters frosted cupcakes together.

Right after dinner we called Grandma and Grandpa on Skype, along with cousins Sofia and Natalie, and we all sang 'happy birthday' to our little man.

This was about a split-second before he surprised us by blowing the candle out before the song was done.  I love his little grin as he was thinking about it.

Today his birthday present from Grandma arrived.  I asked him, "What do you think is in there?"  He yelled, "Trucks!"  He was right, there were all kinds of them.  When he pulled that package of Matchbox cars out of the box, he said, "Wow!"  He's been playing quietly for hours with these things, not causing me any trouble.

I'm going to end this post with some standard 'update' type stuff, since this will be the last one for six months.  It will be in bullet format because I'm in a bit of a hurry as we get closer to the kids' bedtime.  Right now they are wrecking the living room with all those cars and leaving me in peace.

- He still sleeps about 12 hours a night and he takes at least a 2-hour, but more often than not, a 3+ hour nap in the afternoon.  He's still in a crib.

- He still nurses at naptime and bedtime, and wow, we've made it to the age of 2.  He's the only one I've nursed for that long.  

- He is regularly using two or three words at a time, such as "Get it - Wuddy." (This is his way of asking someone else to get Lovey or telling us he wants to get Lovey.)  His grammar is horrible but so cute.  "Mama do'd it."  When he's really upset he is reduced to crying and shrieking one word.

- He can be very indecisive.  A conversation about what to have for breakfast goes something like this: Timmy: "Egg."  Me:  "You want an egg for breakfast?"  Timmy: "No.. Toast!"  Me: "You want toast?"  Timmy:  "No.."

- He is very affectionate with us.  He love to give hugs, kisses and high-fives to all of us.  When he's in the mood, he might give out several hugs and kisses at a time.

- He still tries to bully the other babies and toddlers in the child watch room sometimes.  The ladies who work there keep correcting him and sending him to timeout when necessary, and I think he'll eventually learn as long as he's not allowed to get away with it.  At least he's not knocking over babies like bowling pins anymore.

- He talks about himself in third person sometimes.  He'll say, "Mama.. Daddy.. Sissy.. Timmy.. Sissy.." or something like that.  He likes to look at himself in the mirror too.  He answers the question "Who's Daddy's buddy?" or "Who's Mama's boy?" with a loud and proud "Timmy!"

- We have not even started thinking about potty training.

That is about all I can think of right now.  

Delaney at 6

Our brown eyed girl turned 6 over two weeks ago.  I think she'll understand why I'm so late with her birthday post.  It's been a busy couple of weeks around here.:)  I think this post will consist of many pictures but few words because lately I've been having trouble finding words.  I've been taking a little break from the blog as I just work my way through the busy parts of the day, relax with my family every spare minute, and plop down on the couch next to my husband after the kids are in bed.  I was just reading her 5th birthday post and I know for sure I won't be topping that today.

I think (hope) this year has been every bit as fun for her as I imagined it would.  She has made big strides toward becoming a big kid even though she is tiny.  At 47.5 inches tall and weighing 42.2 pounds, she is at the 7th percentile for height and 34th percentile for weight.  I had worried about her being one of the youngest kids in her kindergarten class, especially with the remarks her preschool teacher had given me on her final progress report.  She said basically that Delaney was very quiet, didn't like to answer questions, and then finished with an optimistic (and somewhat dubious to me based on the comments that preceded it) "She'll bloom in kindergarten."  Or something to that effect.  I hoped for the best and I kind of held my breath those first few weeks.  Delaney made me so proud.  It shouldn't have surprised me at all to see how she grew into such a confident reader and writer, and to hear from her teachers on a regular basis about how well she was doing and how much fun she is to have in class.  But then she's always amazed me.  When she was a baby I'd say, "Look how well she sits" or "Look at what a great crawler she is!"  Everybody sees their own kid as incredible, I guess, and as much as we want to keep them little forever, we still get so excited to see them move on and take another step.

She tried her first organized sport this past spring, soccer.  She had some fun, and she might have started to catch on a little, but she had a massive eczema flare-up that lasted for weeks, and that caused some trouble.  Her eczema is triggered by warmer weather and being outside.  Every spring like clockwork the redness and scales appear on the backs of her knees.  I know she suffered a lot during games and practices, with those socks that come right up to her knees.  Rolling them down a bit didn't even give her much relief.  She tried her hardest to participate but I could tell she was very uncomfortable.  I tried every remedy I'd ever heard of with varying degrees of success, but what finally worked once and for all was a prescription steroid cream called Triamcinalone.  That stuff was a miracle.  After the recommended 10 days of use were up, her skin had completely cleared up.  She was so much happier.  Too bad the soccer season was over by then.  I still have more Triamcinalone, and when the next flare happens I'll be prepared.  She wants to try soccer again in the fall, and I know she'll be able to focus more on the game if she's not constantly itching.

She is very inquisitive and wants to know and understand everything.  If you make an offhand comment around Delaney, she will listen to every word and want to know exactly what you're talking about and what you meant.  It means no more thinking out loud for me unless I'm prepared to explain it all to her.  I have to assume she is always listening if she is anywhere near.  Sometimes it can be the start of a good conversation, but if I don't really want to talk about it I have to think of an answer that will satisfy her anyway.  And she's smart enough to know if I'm just trying to avoid a conversation.  She absorbs everything that we say.  A few weeks ago in a Target dressing room, she told me that my "milky things were droopy and sad."  I couldn't even be offended by that because I knew she hadn't come up with that on her own.  She had to have heard me say it at some point and just filed it away for the perfect moment.  We have to be careful what we say around Delaney!

"I heard that."

She has become more sensitive this year and gets her feelings hurt easily.  She can't stand to see a bug squashed and when she sees Annie or Timmy do it, she cries and accuses them of "hurting nature".  If there's a little critter in the house somewhere, she can be counted on to get rid of it humanely.  She loves all the little creatures -- cockroaches, spiders, flies, ants, everything.  She is their defender.  She is also bruised by the silly insults Annie throws her way, things like "You're not 6, you're 4!"  I wish she would just ignore her like I keep telling her to, but alas, it seems like the secondborn child always knows just what buttons to push on the firstborn.  And the firstborn can never just ignore it.  Then throw in a pesky little brother who gets on everybody's nerves.  (Sigh) The only part of summer I don't like is having them all three at home all the time.  But I digress.  I don't like to see Delaney's feelings get trampled but there's not always much I can do about it.

Delaney with one of her cuter critters

In other ways she is pretty tough.  She was stung by a bee at a birthday party a couple weeks ago, and she didn't say a word to me about it, just got quiet and withdrawn.  I know I cried when I got stung by a bee when I was little.  I did find it strange that she wouldn't at least come to me and tell me instead of just looking all mopey and making me wonder what her problem was.  A couple days before Tim came back she got a little sick and was running a fever.  I gave her some ibuprofen when I put her to bed, and in the morning her fever was gone and she had made her bed without me asking, and seemed cheerful.  I thought she was OK to go to swim lessons, but a few minutes beforehand, she started looking tired and feeling warm.  I told her that she could just rest while Annie did hers.  But she insisted that she wanted to do it and reluctantly, I let her.  She was ready to collapse by the time the half hour was over, and at that point I knew that I REALLY shouldn't have let her, but it also seemed wrong to deny her the chance to do something that she thought she could do.  And after all, she did do it and she did not complain even though she had to swim the length of the pool.  I brought her home, she took a nap (the only time she'll nap is when she's sick), and was good as new by that evening.  She is determined and tough like her dad.  She doesn't let much slow her down.

On the subject of swimming, she passed her swim test at the Y a few days ago, and you never saw someone more proud of herself.  To pass the test she had to swim the length of the pool and then jump in and tread water for 30 seconds.  After that she was given a temporary armband, but she couldn't wait to get the yellow necklace that distinguishes the kids who are swimmers from the ones who are not.  She takes it off to sleep and that's about it.  Now she can go to the deep end by herself and go down the slides.  She is very happy and I am happy for her.

I know there is so much more I should say, and so much that I'm missing as I try to put together a post that does justice to this year of her life.  There are so many special moments, and so many things she says or does that make me laugh or move me, or just make me want to squeeze her.  I mean to jot it down but then the next thing happens, usually a kid who needs me, and the moment is gone.  Of course it's silly to think you can capture a whole year of a child's life in just a few short paragraphs, but that doesn't stop me from trying. 

Delaney, in a few years I will drive you a lot crazier than I do now.  Maybe you'll sit down and read this and know how much we love you and how proud we are of you, and what a blessing and a joy you are to all of us.  Happy belated 6th birthday!   

Timmy at 23 months

He's just one month from being a two-year-old.  Hard to believe.  I was just thinking that this is the first time I've had a kid about to turn two without either just having had another baby or about to have another.  I have to say I am really enjoying this!  I'm getting into the best shape of my life, no exaggeration.  I feel strong and healthy.  I'm finally starting to think I (dare I say it?) have it together as a mom of three, at least most of the time.  I like not having to hide out in the house most of the time, especially now that it's summer.  We go to the pool, we go to the beach, and Timmy doesn't just cling to me constantly.  He follows his sisters instead and he's starting to take cues from them in his behavior.  The other day I was actually able to help out a friend who recently became a mom of three and was having kind of a hard time controlling them all at the pool.  I couldn't help but think about how far I've come -- how far we've come.  To be the one lending a hand rather than the one who needs it is something totally new to me, and very refreshing.  To feel like my moments of struggle don't dominate my days anymore is a welcome thing.  It didn't just suddenly happen -- it's been gradually becoming this way over many months -- but I only recently realized it.

I can't say for sure whether we're done having children.  We are trying to be good Catholics and maintain some openness toward it.  Well, Tim is always open to the idea.  He's ready when I am since he understands that I am the one who has to suffer.  So the question of whether another baby is in our future will have to wait.  We're moving next summer to who knows where, so we'll be wanting to avoid having a baby then, that's for sure.  But if we're going to have another I can't put it off forever as I'm not getting any younger.  Today I turn 34.  For now, I am happy to keep my focus on Timmy as the baby because he is at this adorable stage of asserting his independence but at the same time needing me so much still.  I am filled with wonder and joy as I watch him grow and change into a little boy, and so glad to have my lap and arms still open for when he comes running to me.

I told the girls to wake Timmy up yesterday morning, and a few minutes later I came in and found him and Delaney like this.  

Timmy at 22 months

I can't stand being so far behind on a Timmy update.  After he turns 2 I'll switch to updates every 6 months, and that will be a relief since I'm suddenly finding once a month very hard to keep up with.  

He keeps getting longer and leaner.  His swim trunks from last year fit.  Actually, one of them is a little big around the waist.  His swim diaper still fits and that's good, although I think I'll get him one more just because it will be nice to have one more.  We'll be doing lots of swimming this summer.

He does not say any sentences, but he says individual words constantly.  He echoes the last word anyone around him says in a funny questioning tone that never fails to remind me of Sloth on Goonies.  "Ruth?  Ruth?  Ruth?  Baby Ruth?"  Anyone remember that?  

He has begun putting two words together on occasion.  He says, "Danku" (thank you) when anyone hands him anything.  My little boy is getting manners, I'm so proud.  I've also heard him say "buddop" (bus stop).  He'll also say, "Got it!" or "Did it!" with a big self-congratulatory grin to go with it.  That's about all I can think of.  He's taken the longest of the three of them to start talking, but he's coming along.  

I waited eagerly for him to start saying his sisters' names.  He says "Annie" a lot, but doesn't usually attempt "Delaney."  If I ask him to say "Delaney" he says something that sounds more like "daddy."  The other day in the car, he said, "Annie, teeheehee, Annie, teehee.." again and again.  Yesterday morning when he woke up, he started calling, "Annie!  Annie!"  I find this interesting since Annie is the sister that picks on him all the time, and Delaney's his buddy.  Either he has just picked the name that is easier to say, or he likes Annie a whole lot more than he lets on.

He melted my heart a couple days ago when Delaney was crying because we'd gone to the pool that day while she was at school.  (We're not supposed to be doing anything fun during the hours she's at school.)  He went to her and laid a hand on her back and offered her his Lovey.  He has so much love in his heart, and it makes me so happy to see him learning how to be kind and caring.

4 years -- and at least 11 weeks -- of those cheeks.. Happy birthday, Annie!

3D ultrasound at 28 weeks

5/19/09.  9 lbs even and 22 inches long :O.  Her funnel cloud birthmark has faded a lot, but you can still see it when she gets really mad.

I love the slobber droplets ready to fall off her chin.

A family photographer snapped this picture of her in a fit of silliness soon after her 3rd birthday.

Tim snapped this picture of his desk, emailed it to me and told me to tell Annie that when he misses her this is what he looks at.

I took this picture when she wrote her name for the first time a few weeks ago.  I wish she'd written it in marker instead of pencil, but if you look closely you can see it.  

At some point not long ago, Annie started holding her pen the right way and writing letters.  She learned how to swing herself on the swings at her preschool playground, a feat she is very proud of (as well she should be since her older sister hasn't accomplished that yet).  She likes to tell me about how Claire showed her that you have to "just keep moving your legs up and down forever".  Now she can show her sister.  She loves arts and crafts -- drawing, painting, stickers, beads, glitter, and pretty much anything.  Sometimes she asks if she can glue little pieces of paper to big pieces of paper.  She loves tormenting her brother on minute, and then loving on him the next.  She loves being read to, and she'll ask for her favorite books again and again for at least a week or two.  Her new favorites are her newly acquired Fancy Nancy book :) and Lalaloopsy book :(.  She loves sweets.  Her favorite meal is spaghetti and meatballs, which she picked for her birthday dinner.

If she is told something she already knows, she takes it as a personal affront and says vehemently, "I already knew that!"  We are forever telling Annie something she already knows or would have figured out herself if we had just given her the chance.  Sheesh!  She is also insulted when I open the car door just before she gets there because she knows how to do that and she can do it herself.  

She makes a lot of jokes about poop and pee.  Sometimes she'll blurt out, "I pooped my pants!" before dissolving into hysterical high-pitched cackles.  At least once a day she is overcome with the urge to run and twirl around in circles until, dizzy, she collapses on the ground.

She still naps every afternoon for two hours.

She is afraid of almost all animals, but most especially dogs.  I don't know when it started or how it started, but she wasn't always this way.  A couple months ago, she wouldn't even pet her friend's hamster.  She runs in the house if the neighbor's pitbulls even look at her.

I can't wait to see what the next year holds for Annie-banannie.  We sure do love this crazy little girl.

Timmy at 21 months

I thought things would only get harder the closer he got to the age of 2, but for some reason I feel like I got a reprieve this month with Timmy.  He and Annie still fight, but not as much and not as intensely.  Strapping him into the car seat is not a wrestling match anymore, but he does insist on doing at least one or two of the clips himself.  Fine by me -- it beats having to pin him into the seat with my forearm two or three times a day.  I haven't heard of any more problems with the babies in the child watch room these past few weeks, either.  Sometimes I even get him to voluntarily hold my hand in a parking lot.  He can be stubborn at times, but mostly he is just sweet and curious, silly, lovable, and so much fun.

I love the way he wakes up in the morning and after his nap.  I hear his happy babble and I know there's no rush to go in there and get him.  He loves when one or the other of his sisters goes in there and plays with him.  He lines up toy cars and trains on the crib rail, one of the girls will climb in the crib with him and cover him up with the blanket, and they'll play all sorts of silly games.  After a little while I go in there and see his bright happy face. He looks like he's hosting a little party and he'd be happy to stay in his crib and enjoy the attention of his sisters all day long.

He still doesn't say more than one word at a time (more and more words all the time), but he's letting me know more and more what he wants and getting to be particular about it, especially when it comes to food.  I ask him what he wants to drink and he'll shake his head "yes" if I get it right and "no" if I don't.  He wants to pick his own yogurt or cheese snack out of the fridge.  He tries to eat the cheese snack through the wrapper.  What he doesn't like he tosses off his tray.  He'll say the name of what he wants if it's easy to say:  "Milk", "juice," "cheese", and his favorite, "CHEET!" (treat)  He tells me he wants a "bite" of whatever I'm having.

At some point in time his eyes changed from green to hazel without me noticing.  His grandpa pointed it out as soon as he got a good look at his face.  He said, "Let's see, Timmy, what color are your eyes?.. I think they're hazel like mine!"  I had to take a few good looks myself, but sure enough, there is a little bit of brown mixed in with the green.  I got as close as I dared with the camera to take a good picture of his eyes.  I put him in a trance by singing the "Elmo's World" theme song so he'd sit still.  That boy loves his Elmo!

He is very attached to his little cars and trucks, and he is like a squirrel with acorns carrying them around the house and arranging them just so.  He lines them up side by side, and other times end to end.  He is always surprised and happy to find one that he's forgotten about, in a crease of his car seat or in a toy bin.  He holds them up to hear us say what color they are and then repeats.  "Geen."  "Boo."  "Lellow."  But he can't remember which is which.  I'm happy to see him taking an interest in colors.  He also wants us to tell him what color different crayons are, and Annie loves the chance to show off her knowledge.

He also loves to point out actual cars and trucks, and he loves big trucks.  Tim Sr and I were talking about how we are going to have to get a car seat for Tim's truck so he can ride in it.  It would seriously make his day.  We've been too cheap to buy car seats for the truck to this point.

He loves wearing shirts that have pictures on them.  His favorite one has a diagram of an airplane taking off, and he loves it if I point to it and make airplane sounds.

He laughs when he toots.  And he toots a lot.  Almost as much as Annie.

If you ask him where something or somebody is and he doesn't know, he does this:

Where did Sissy go?

He always has a blister on his thumb from sucking it.

He nurses just twice a day now.  When he gets up in the morning he's too busy to be interested.  I can barely get him to sit in his chair for breakfast.  So now we've taken another step toward weaning, and it makes me glad and a little sad at the same time.  Mostly I am happy that again, I have a child who will be gradually and easily weaned.

Timmy at 20 months

Our baby boy is now 20 months old.  The past few weeks have seen more attempts at saying words, more disagreements with Annie, and a lot more of the behavior that says, 'Remember, Mama, I'm an individual with an agenda of my own!'

Somewhere along the way, Timmy figured out that when he shrugs his shoulders and smiles, people think it's cute.  He does it to me all the time because he knows I'll always laugh and say, "Don't you shrug your shoulders at me!"  His timing is always so perfect.  I'll be bustling around the kitchen while he's sitting at the table, and I'll say, "Are you hungry for lunch, Timmy?"  I'll turn around and see that little shrug and the twinkle in his eye.  "Don't you shrug your shoulders at me!"  No, really, keep doing it because it's adorable and I love it.

Timmy continues to grow longer and leaner.  I just cut the feet off his footie pajamas.  He didn't gain even an ounce between his 12- and 18-month appointments, but he grew three inches taller.  I just love his little physique, the way he stands so tall and straight, and how much longer his legs are starting to look.  I can't wait until it warms up enough to put him in shorts.  I've noticed lately what a great appetite he's had and how he's even more tired than usual at naptime and bedtime.  I think he's having a growth spurt.  This is the only picture I could find that shows his gangly little legs.  He's been in pants for the majority of the last month.

At least once every day, Timmy needs to take a break from playing for a cuddle.  Usually it's with me.  He'll whine and hold onto my legs until I sit down on the floor.  Then he'll turn around and have a seat on my lap and I'll wrap my arms around him, relishing the feel of that busy little body resting against mine and the sight of his cute little feet resting on the floor.  I might tell him in that goofy-sounding voice I use with my babies, "Oh Timmy, I love you so!  And I'm nevah, evah, evah gonna let you go!"  One time he picked big sis Delaney to take a cuddle break with, and it melted my heart, the two of them like that.  I ran for my camera to capture the magic.

I still nurse him three times a day.  I was hoping to nurse him through cold and flu season this year, and it looks like I've met my goal.  He was certainly a healthy specimen this winter, a lot healthier than some of the rest of us were at times.  Now it looks like we'll easily make it to age 2, which would be a lot longer than I nursed either of the girls.  The circumstances have been different with each of them.  I got pregnant with Annie when Delaney was only 13 months old, and three months later my milk dried up.  The summer after Annie turned one was very busy with traveling and moving.  Weaning was the easy and convenient thing to do, and I think I made it to just shy of 14 months with her.  With Timmy I'll probably be looking to wind down in the next few months, but there's really no urgency.  He doesn't walk up and lift my shirt any time or anywhere.  He's accustomed to only nursing in the glider rocker in his room, and only at specific times.  So as long as it's going well, we'll see how long it goes.

He and Annie fight constantly.  I usually yell at her to just give him whatever it is he wants.  This is how I see it: she always starts playing with something she knows he likes right in front of him, and she does it on purpose.  Although he may not have been playing with it before, he wants it when he sees Annie with it.  Then he starts to screech, and I start to yell at Annie, "Why do you always play with the things he likes right in front of him?"  And it's something she has no interest in, she just enjoys pushing his buttons.  So I make her give it to him, whatever it is.  I might be spoiling him, but I can't stand to hear that screeching.  It's like nails on a chalkboard and I'll do anything to make it stop.

Timmy's been getting into a bit of trouble in the nursery at the Y.  It seems after having to deal with big sisters at home, he is very enthusiastic about seeing kids who are smaller than he is.  At first I would hear, "Timmy loves the babies.  He's so nice to them."  That turned into, "Timmy keeps trying to pick up the babies.  We have to keep telling him not to do that."  From there it progressed to this morning when I walked in to pick him and Annie up after my workout, and saw him sitting alone on a chair facing the back door.  I said, "Aw, is Timmy in timeout?"  I actually didn't believe he was because he didn't look upset.  Pulling a chair over to the back door and looking out at the view outside seemed like something one of my kids might do.  You never know.  I was told by one of the women who work there, "Yes, he's in timeout because he knocked over the babies three times.  And he tried to wrestle this one," she said, indicating a red-haired baby boy on her hip who looked to be maybe 7 months old.  I was like, "Oh no!"  By now Timmy knew I was there and he got out of the chair and came running over to me.  I picked him up and brought him right back to that chair and said, "No, buddy, you've got to go back to timeout until they say you're done.  You can't be pushing the babies."  He started to cry, then came running back to me, and I put him back in the chair.  It hurt my heart to see him crying so hard but we've got to nip that behavior in the bud.  He'll get us kicked out of the nursery!  He stayed there and cried for a little while longer until the girl who put him there went to get him out.  I could see her having a little talk with him, probably about being gentle with the babies.  He was very subdued for a couple minutes after that, clinging onto me with a sad look on his face.  I admit the whole thing was a little distressing for me.  I haven't felt the need to put Timmy in timeout more than once or twice at home, and I still just think of him as a baby himself, mostly because he doesn't talk yet and that makes me think he doesn't understand things.  And of course at home, he doesn't have anyone smaller to pick on.  He's usually the one being picked on.  I definitely think the timeout was appropriate and I did my best to back them up on it.  (I don't even think it even felt like timeout to him until I walked in and didn't rescue him.)  I hope that made an impression on him, and maybe next time a warning will suffice.  Better yet, the next time he gets the urge to treat the babies like bowling pins, he'll go play with some cars or trains instead.

I don't want to end this update on that note so I will post a video of Timmy and I goofing around in the kitchen.  Alright, I tried to post it in two different browsers but it didn't work.  (What do I pay Google $2.49 a month for anyway!?)  I no longer know how to embed YouTube videos either.  Here is the link to the video in YouTube for any grandparents who want to see.