Annie is 10!

We kicked off "birthday season" (four out of six of us have late spring or summer birthdays) this past weekend with Annie's 10th birthday. To celebrate, Annie requested a sleepover with her friends Grace and Avery. We did that Saturday night. Avery ended up not being able to make it, but Annie and Grace had fun making their own little pizzas for dinner, painting ceramics, having cake and ice cream, and doing whatever else it was they did. Delaney also participated, and Tim took the boys out of the house for a couple hours to help make it more of a girl-oriented evening. I think we succeeded in making the day a little special for her. 

As cheesy as this always sounds to say, it has been a delight to watch Annie grow and see the young lady she is becoming. To have a front row seat for this is one of the best parts of being her mother. 

Annie has become a second set of hands for me. If I need someone to get Joey dressed on Easter Sunday morning because I'm getting myself ready and Tim's handling a crisis on the phone --Annie. If I need something baked, or even something just gotten out of the oven--Annie. (I don't bake much myself anymore, since she'd rather do it.) If I need someone to make a simple dinner or pack a lunch--Annie. She makes pancakes from scratch every Thursday, which is "breakfast for dinner" night. You might notice that the place where she helps me the most is in the kitchen. That's where I need all the help I can get! For the first two weeks of July, she's going to be attending a full-day cooking camp with her friend Grace. I'm kind of shooting myself in the foot sending my most helpful kid to camp for 10 days, but I know it's something she'll enjoy, and I'm hoping we'll all benefit from what she learns there.

She is also a second set of eyes and ears. We are very impressed by her powers of observation. Whatever I say in her vicinity, she has recorded in her mind and will play it back for me word for word (which, truthfully, can be inconvenient at times). If she's nearby while I'm in a conversation with somebody, and I'm trying to remember a detail from it later on, she's got me covered. If the police ever need to know where I was and what I was doing on any given day, I'll tell them I have to ask Annie. A couple weeks ago the girls and I were having a conversation, and it came up that Annie remembered that one of the preschool dads had worn the same plaid shirt at two different events, and she named the colors in it. I was blown away. She has said she wants to own a bakery when she grows up, but Delaney and I decided she also needs to be in the FBI, and for a funny few minutes we riffed on the idea of Annie the baker-spy. Think little folded-up messages inside of pastries, and her eyes watching everybody and missing nothing. In all seriousness though, I told her that her ability to pay close attention and remember things will serve her well in life.

For anyone who knows Annie well, her being observant is nothing new. What is new, as of the last couple years, is that instead of just watching what's going on around her, she's much more engaged. It used to be that around this time of year, her teachers might say something to me like, "Well, she's starting to come out of her shell a little.." What they meant was that she was at least no longer completely mute; she was starting to participate in some activities, so that was progress. Her kindergarten teacher once told me that during choice time, when kids were free to move about the room and play with things like blocks or dress-up clothes, Annie would ask for math worksheets and toil alone at her desk. There's nothing wrong with working hard, but we are so happy to see she's having some fun now, too. Remember the little girl who couldn't be bothered to move from one spot on the soccer field a few years ago? After her last game of the season a week ago, she couldn't wait to tell me she'd scored a goal with her left foot. She gets her athleticism from her father.

She is super generous, and whenever she receives money or a gift card, she often shares the wealth with her siblings. Knowing how much she loves clothes (and how bad I am at gauging what she likes and what will fit), I gave her a Target gift card for her birthday, and completely unprompted, she allowed each of her siblings to pick out something small in addition to what she got for herself. If her teacher gives her a piece of candy as a reward, she brings it home and gives it to Joey. She chose a cookie cake for the night of her sleepover because she knew that's what Grace liked best. She gave me a cute necklace and matching key chain for Mother's Day, and I was touched just knowing she had even thought to get me a gift. It is a wonderful quality to always be thinking about others.

We are filled with wonder and gratitude for the gift of Annalise Elizabeth, and excited to see all that 10 holds for her. As her Grandy, who is also her godmother, wrote in her card: "May you continue to grow in grace and wisdom as well as age."

Annie's 9th Birthday

Every time one of the kids has a birthday, it feels like my birthday except better since I'm not the one who's another year older.😊 I remember the agony and the joy of bringing them into the world, and marvel at how much they and I have changed since then. The kids themselves see each birthday as a magical milestone, a precise line between their new age and the last. Annie asked me the day before what time she'd been born. I told her 5:23 a.m. and she nodded, satisfied to know that first thing in the morning of the 19th, she would in fact be nine years old.

I did not sleep in Saturday morning; I got up at the usual time of 7 at the request of my new nine-year-old, so she didn't have to wait any longer to open her presents. She was overjoyed with the roller skates and jump rope that her daddy and Delaney had picked out for her. She ran to them and gave them hugs after opening them. Then she opened the Converse sneakers that she knew I'd picked out, and ran over to give me my hug. I thought it was funny how she'd kept track of exactly what came from whom, instead of thinking of her presents as from both parents. She misses nothing. She'd already seen the gift bag on the highest shelf of my closet and asked if she could open it first thing in the morning. (True, I hadn't made much effort to hide it.) She also knew what her father and sister were up to when they went on an errand the night before by themselves. I'm not raising a fool!

Annie has never rollerskated so safely.

Later in the morning the girls and I gathered up our birthday supplies and headed out for Annie's painting party with the girls in her class.

She had an incident when her hair went in the paint, and I said, "Annie's hair is always going into everything." (Especially her dinner) She was a fan of having green ends and didn't want to wash it out.

These two were the first done with their paintings and just hovered around the cake until the other girls were done and it was time to sing. Of course they did.🙄

Tim picked up Annie's dinner of choice, sushi, early in the afternoon so it would be there waiting for us when we got home from Mass. Annie had two spicy tuna rolls, and maybe some ramen noodles and miso soup. I didn't notice much because I was too busy feasting on all the sushi and cutting up things for Joey.

It had been decided days before that we would roast s'mores that night, but when the weather took a turn for the worse, the girls got really pouty at the idea of taking a rain check. I would have said too bad, but Tim's way nicer than I am. When the rain took a break he went ahead and made a fire in the wet backyard. Everyone was happy.

That was that, another birthday in the books. I am grateful on her birthday and always, for the gift of Annalise Elizabeth in our lives. I can't wait to see what her last year in single digits holds for her.

Annie is 8!

Annie is getting to be such a big kid. It's hard to believe she was just the baby sister when I started this blog and look her now, big sister to two brothers -- one who is pretty much her nemesis and the other whom she dotes on constantly and pines for when they're apart. Any idea which is which? Haha. Tim likes to say to Joey, "One day she's gonna turn on you." I like to think that will never happen.

I haven't dedicated too much of this blog to Annie of late, but she's enjoying a heyday this month. So, what can I tell you about her?..

She's an outstanding student; her teachers have always raved about her. I have a story I'll try to tell quickly: The day we left for Cincinnati last week, Tim and I went to the kids' schools to pick them up. We wanted them to get at least a half day in because we'd had them miss more than a few days already this semester. Annie's teacher, Mrs. G, had texted me the night before to ask how long Annie would be in school that day. I told her until right after lunch because that was what Tim and I had discussed. Then Tim got antsy and wanted to get me to the airport sooner, and although I tried to hold him back we ended up getting them well before lunch was over. When Tim came out of the school with Annie and Timmy he also had a cupcake which he said was for Delaney. Mrs. G had brought them to school, planning to celebrate Annie's birthday with the class after lunch. When Tim told me this it made me sad that we had sabotaged Mrs. G's plan to sing happy birthday to Annie with the whole class. It also occurred to me that Annie hadn't told me to tell her she didn't want her birthday celebrated at school. For the first time since Pre-K, she might have been comfortable with it, and that would have been special. I just hadn't given the issue any thought at all as we got ready to take off on a trip that happened to coincide with her birthday. So I texted Mrs. G while I sat in the car, apologizing and thanking her for her thoughtfulness. This is in part what she replied: "She is so well worth the efforts made for her. I really do love her. She excels!!!!! And the class loves her too!" Then a little while later, "Let me clarify .. she really is the sweetest but it is so wonderful that she excels as well." We're very proud of her.

She finally has her front two bottom permanent teeth, but all the rest are still baby teeth.

She's growing her hair super long and takes pretty good care of it. She likes fixing it different ways, braids, buns and bows and head bands. Sometimes she asks me to straighten or curl it or do French braids. On Grace's wedding day she opted to spend the day with me, my sisters and Grace's kids while we had our hair and makeup done. It was nice having her around for a whole day of beautification, and I helped her fix her hair and painted her fingernails and toenails more than once since she can't seem to let them dry without damaging them somehow. Oh, and on the subject of nails: she quit biting them cold turkey several months ago. I was so impressed to see her nails growing and I asked her how she did it. I know how hard it is to break a nail-biting habit. She said, "I just didn't like it anymore."

She likes clothes and puts together really cute outfits, and I like seeing that since being put together is a good thing. I should try it more often.

She's very generous with her siblings, even Timmy. Just recently she bought them all books at the book fair. I love that it comes so naturally to her to share, and hope she always remains a generous giver. There have been times we've worried about her being too generous, like the time a friend messaged me asking if I was really OK with Annie giving her daughter a really nice bracelet. To this day I don't know what bracelet it was. It couldn't have been that expensive because not even I own a bracelet that costs more than $20! I still wondered, but if it was hers to give, it was hers to give.

Of all the kids, she conks out the fastest at bedtime and is up and at 'em in the morning with no prodding needed.

She remains our most dependable helper with Joe. She loves playing on the playground with him, and she even taught him how to go down the twisty slide feet first a few months ago. She likes playing music and dancing with him, chasing him around the house, and really anything. Most importantly to us, when we ask her to keep an eye on him for a few minutes, she has the attention span to do so.

Since reading The Temperament God Gave Your Kids by Art and Laraine Bennett, I've been into assigning temperaments to my kids. I've mentioned Timmy is a sanguine and Delaney is phlegmatic. I'm not sure about Joey yet, but I'm leaning toward choleric. I'd classify Annie as mainly melancholic, with a dash of choleric that she displays only inside her comfort zone (with us at home). The Bennetts say melancholics are "mysterious as a smooth stone on the sand -- impenetrable, dark, pressing into the ground -- concealing beneath its surface something precious. Melancholics are deep, serious and idealistic." (I like this description because I'm always thinking Annie is an enigma to me in many ways.) They like to observe more so than interact, and for this reason often appear aloof. They are slow to warm up in new situations and love routine. For example, Annie always sees the things written on my menu or the white board (agenda) in the kitchen as etched in stone, and doesn't like it when I change them on the fly. She also likes for snacks and meals to happen at a set time. Melancholics are serious and quiet, rarely speaking up in class. They are refreshed by activities like crafts, art or sewing, that allow them to focus and just be inside their own heads. That would definitely be Annie. She has mentioned she'd like a sewing machine, but I'd like her to be a little older when she gets one. Melancholics have a keen sense of fairness, like Annie who keeps score and expects 100% fairness and equality no matter how many times we tell her how unrealistic that expectation is. They are also known for their attention to detail, which Annie displayed in a picture she drew recently of her grandma that amazed me for its accuracy. Even though it was clearly a kid's drawing, the outfit she'd drawn for her grandmother was spot on. It was like seeing her through Annie's eyes.

She shows her choleric side when she bosses Timmy around and acts as the enforcer of rules. I am pretty sure this is a side of her never seen by people outside our family.

Not only has the book helped me identify our kids' temperaments and what their strengths and weaknesses tend to be; it also offers practical advice on how best to talk to them, discipline and motivate them. In the case of Annie, there are tips for helping her out of her shell and preparing her for changes. I'm finding it very helpful to flip through again and again. I'd also be interested to read The Temperament God Gave You, even though I have a good hunch that I'm a melancholic too.

It occurs to me that I've discussed how Annie gets along with Timmy and with Joey, but not with Delaney. She and Delaney get along well, rarely fighting or arguing. They've shared a room for years together without incident, and now they ride the bus together, playing with the stuffed animals they've filled their enormous LL Bean backpacks with. Since they're only 22 months apart, I've treated them like twins in many ways. I've bought clothes for them both to share since they've been the same size since they were 3 and 5, they nighttime potty trained together, and they tend to stick together wherever we go. It makes me happy that although making friends doesn't always come easily to either of them, they each have a lifelong friend in the other. I wasn't thinking about that at all back when I had one baby and was itching to have another before the first was even a year old, but I am very grateful for that.

We celebrated Annie's birthday twice -- once with her grandma and grandpa (Tim's parents) here, and again  in Cincinnati the day after Grace's wedding at Scotty and Faith's. I think she had a very happy birthday and I look forward to seeing everything age 8 holds for her.

Annie's First Communion

I've got a lot of catching up to do here. Lots of good things have happened this month.

Tim's parents came down one last time for a visit Mother's Day weekend for Annie's First Communion. It is always so nice to spend time with them, and I'm glad we had mostly good weather to do fun things.

I love this picture Tim Sr took of Joey while washing the rental car. Not sure why he wanted to wash the rental car..? Joey sure had fun though!

Delaney found a little lizard and was tormenting Grandma with it. Why wouldn't anyone want a lizard at the dinner table?

I hate asking strangers to take our pictures, especially when it's with my big clunky camera, but I just couldn't pass up the opportunity since this would be the last time we all went downtown together. I watched and waited and finally chose another mom I'd noticed sitting on the rock wall where we were all kind of congregating. She apologetically said no because she had four kids she was keeping an eye on, and I felt so bad for asking. I was going to give up and go home but then she got someone else to watch the kids while she snapped a few pictures. I was grateful but still felt so awkward. Maybe I'll get a little tripod that folds up small one of these days, and use it with the timer so I don't have to harass anyone. 

Sunday morning was Annie's First Communion. Getting ready in the morning, I hit an unexpected snag in my plans when Annie first asked while I was curling her hair, "What's a veil?" When I told her, she said, "I don't want to wear that." I'm gonna go ahead and post this picture taken by Tim(?) that illustrates perfectly what Annie thought about that veil.

I was all, "But your sister wore it." "But it's so beautiful." "But that's what girls do on their First Communion, they wear veils." But! But! Tim and I had a whispered exchange after her hair was done and I'd cut her loose for the time being. He said, "I'll work on her," but something to the effect of 'let's not pick this battle, it's not that big of a deal.' I backed down. It wasn't as if the veil was made from my wedding dress or anything special. Besides, the veil was not what this day was about.

In the end I took the veil with us when we went to the chapel because Annie said she'd wear it if the other two girls in our little Catholic community on base were wearing them. I also thought maybe I could convince her to put it on for at least a couple pictures. When we walked into the chapel I was crestfallen to see that neither of the two other girls receiving First Communion had veils. What kind of conspiracy was this? But I got over it because they all looked beautiful anyway. I got some pictures of Annie without the veil, with the veil, and I accepted that she was just more comfortable without it.

To my surprise, I think I like the pictures of her without the veil better. At least I had learned my lesson from Delaney's First Communion, that I should set it back farther back on her head so it's not hiding her face. 

We had some cake in the rear of the chapel afterward, and then had a laid-back rest of the day and burgers and hot dogs for dinner. We celebrated Annie's birthday with leftover First Communion cake and candles. They left in the morning after the kids got on the bus, but we'll be seeing them again in July when Tim flies up with the Big 3 and leaves them there for a few weeks while we finish up moving, and then in August when we're all up there for a few days.

20 Questions for Annie at Age 7

1. Who is your favorite person in the world? Daddy.

2. What is your favorite color? Blue.

3. What is your favorite TV show? Star Wars. (I explain that's not really a TV show; it's a movie. But she wants to keep it anyway.)

4. What's your favorite outfit? The blue flower dress. (Annie LOVES dresses, and she got a whole bunch of them for her birthday.)

5. What sport do you like best? Soccer.

6. What song do you love? Shake it Off.

7. What's your favorite cereal? Cookie Crisp.

8. Who is your best friend? Avah.

9. What do you want to be when you grow up? A vet. Her (Delaney's) assistant.

10. What's your favorite book? The one I'm reading right now. (She shows it to me. It's The Cupcake Club: Bakers on Board.)

11. What are you really good at? Reading and math.

12. Where do you wish you could go on vacation? Massachusetts.

13. What is your best memory? When I got born. Dissolves into hysterical giggles. Because what if I wasn't a person? What if my life didn't come? Deep.

14. What would you buy if you had $1000? An iPad.

15. What's your favorite vegetable? Um, carrots because they're the only ones I'll eat.. No, corn!

16. If you could have a wish, what would it be? To have a baby girl. No, twins.

17. What is your favorite flavor of ice cream? Mint chocolate chip.

18. Who is your biggest hero? Daddy!

19. What do you like to do with your friends? Go to their houses and play.

20. What do you hope you'll get to do before your next birthday? Go to the zoo and the aquarium.

Annie is 7!

Today we celebrate seven years of Annalise Elizabeth. Today when she woke up, Delaney and Timmy were unloading the dishwasher for her. She was scheduled to do it this morning, but I guess they didn't think it was right for her to have dishwasher duty on her birthday. There was a cluster of balloons attached to her chair at the table, all filled with helium. Only the glimmery mylar one was still standing this morning; the rest had fallen during the night. Yay for the glimmery one that had been inflated at Bi-Lo and not with a two-year-old helium tank in our closet! She asked me to fix her hair in "two pigtails that are high and coming out the side; and then braid the pigtails." She accessorized her school uniform with dangly heart earrings and the arm candy she never leaves home without -- a stack of colorful ponytail holders on her wrist. When I asked her to smile for a picture, she struck a silly pose. Tim asked her if her teacher was going to have the class sing 'happy birthday', and she emphatically said no. He asked if her friends at school knew it was her birthday, and she said no. I asked her if her teacher knows not to make a thing out of her birthday; or would she be upset if she did? Annie told me that there's going to be a sub today who won't know. Annie loves her birthday, but doesn't want it celebrated at school. It's a puzzling contradiction, but those are part of what makes Annie Annie.

Despite her best efforts, she's reached the age of seven with every single baby tooth intact, one with a charming chip. Two days ago, she came home from school and told me about a plan that she and her friend Avah had come up with, to get her to lose a tooth. The plan made me so nervous I wondered if I should stop her, and texted Tim saying as much. It involved Annie on a trampoline with a string tied to the tooth and something else. Since Avah had recently lost a tooth a few months before, with the aid of a string tied to an arrow, I knew she meant business. But Tim didn't think I should stop them, so I decided to let the free-range parenting side of me win (it usually does), and just hope for the best. A couple hours later she returned, telling me about how the tooth had started to bleed and hurt, and that had been the end of that. I do think it's safe to say this is her year for the Tooth Fairy.

Her pottery painting birthday party on Saturday was a resounding success, to the delight of myself and the mothers of the other girls present. Even though she had asked for this party, we all know that she doesn't always enjoy being the center of attention. (See the first paragraph, in which she is keeping her birthday a secret at school.) But Annie must have decided to embrace it for one day, because she really seemed to relish the role of birthday girl, and she was so excited about everything. She thanked everyone for their presents and even gasped and said, "I love it!" a couple times. The gift she was most excited about was a little blue turtle named Powder who moves like a real turtle and can swim. She got it from "Other Delaney" down the street. "Other Delaney" was so happy to see Annie happy.

First grade has been good for her. She remains happiest sitting at a desk with a book or busywork, but her teacher tells me that she's been growing more comfortable with speaking in front of the class and working in groups. This is huge. Last year in Kindergarten Annie would ask her teacher for math worksheets to do instead of "stations", in which kids get to move freely around the classroom and do a number of different activities. She's in the gifted math class this year, and I am proud of her, although I worry that the term "gifted" can put pressure on a kid. I never had to worry about that. I think at her age I was still counting on my fingers. (Who am I kidding, I still count on my fingers!)

Annie told me one day that she'd made her math teacher laugh so hard that the other class had been disrupted. I asked her how, and she told me that when the teacher had said, "I laugh like a pig," she had replied, "I would agree with you." I laughed too as I envisioned her saying it, solemn and wide eyed. Her teachers probably love it anytime she pipes up.

This is how she left her bed this morning: a pile at the foot that includes Shel Silverstein's mug on the back cover of The Giving Tree. It is messy, and the shams are on the floor as usual. But it is made.

Today when she and Tim get home, they will make the cake that she picked at the commissary: dark chocolate fudge on top and bottom -- interesting choice. Then we will eat her favorite dinner, tacos. Afterward we will sing 'happy birthday', eat cake and ice cream, and she will open presents from us and her grandparents. I couldn't ask for a better day. Happy birthday to Annie!