There's Something Going Around Part 2

And having nothing to do and nowhere to be, I thought now would be a good time for a quick blog update. I have a little bit of catching up to do because I've been a busy mama and a lazy blogger.

All of this isolation and "social distancing" is for the most part business as usual for Tim and me, hermits that we are. We don't really like people.🤣 Kidding, sort of. But we did have some things that we were looking forward to, that are either cancelled already or not looking good. Delaney was very sad to find out her band field trip to Busch Gardens, scheduled to happen in April, has been cancelled. She, along with the rest of band, had also been working hard preparing for performances that won't be happening after all. Soccer season was just getting underway, and without it, it's hard for the kids not having the motivation to get outside and get moving. Now we are back to just pushing them out the back door when it's nice out. The Bridge Run 10K that Tim and I were supposed to participate in at the end of this month, is a no-go. We were (and maybe, possibly still are) looking forward to meeting my parents in Asheville for part of spring break, and touring the Biltmore. The DoD is banning all travel outside of the local area for active duty and families, but we are keeping our hotel reservation until the last possible minute. Oh, and it's our anniversary today, and I guess I'll be waiting to see what Tim cooks up for me for dinner, because we will not be going out. (And we had just started to spread our wings a little bit, now that we have a child or two old enough to put in charge for a couple hours.)

Now, in what is a very strange turn of events for us all, we are hunkered down and homeschooling for at least a couple weeks; my kids' teachers will be posting all lessons and assignments online, and as long as they are completing the assignments, they will be counted present. Timmy's teacher didn't even miss a beat, and he's been doing school here since yesterday morning. Annie will start Monday, and hopefully so will Delaney. I've got a letter-tracing workbook on the way for Joey. I am so glad we're doing distance learning this time, remembering how many school days were lost after Hurricane Florence and what a big fat waste of time that was. With the Y closed, I've signed up for a trial subscription of Beachbody on Demand, and today Annie and Joey joined me in the entryway for Piyo. We took a walk/bike ride today, and long after the other kids had gone back inside, I watched Joey ride back and forth through the same puddle at least twenty times. He kept telling me he was almost done, but I said, "Joe, you go through that puddle as many times as you want."

And now for the catching up...

I think that last time I talked about our plans here, it was about Tim retiring and us moving to his hometown in Massachusetts. About a couple months ago, we had a change of heart. He is still retiring, but we are staying here. It was not a decision we made easily. It was more like a feeling in my gut that I tried to ignore. But then one night Tim broached the subject, telling me he was really struggling with the decision to move, and that unleashed a torrent of everything I'd been holding back, and how long I'd been feeling like our months here were a long, sad goodbye. The closer the time came, the more I felt we belonged here, but I prayed for God to change my mind if this was not meant to be. Tim was quite a bit taken aback after hearing everything I had to say, and then he said, "Well, it would have been nice if you'd told me this a couple years ago." I know, but I didn't know then! The days surrounding the decision were ones of turmoil and lots of tears.

Tim and I always knew it would be hard to figure out what to do after the Marine Corps, so we just kept putting off making decisions until it was impossible to any longer. We knew it would be hard, but we really had no idea. It felt like groping around blind. This past winter, we came thisclose to purchasing a home in Grafton, Massachusetts, and the only reason it didn't work out was because of some unpermitted work that had been done in the basement, that made it too risky for us. After that fell through, we thought we'd put the househunting on hold because we had no desire to go through this process of trying to figure it all out from so far away. It's too big of a decision, and we are chronic overthinkers. How many more plane tickets were we going to buy so Tim could go see for himself if a place was really where we wanted to live? His parents had room for us to live a few months if need be. Our new plan was just to do nothing and wait till we go there. In that lull, we found ourselves asking again and again, why would we want to leave here? North Carolina feels like home, the kids are settled and happy, the winter is cold enough here on some days... And you know the rest.

We're moving just a couple miles down the road to a subdivision that has many more younger families with kids than our current neighborhood has, and Joey's going to be riding circles around our own cul-de-sac. The closing is scheduled for April 1, and then we'll spend a couple months making it the way we want it before we move in sometime late June. Delaney and Annie will be attending the same middle school that Delaney currently is, and Joey will be going to the same preschool for one more year. Timmy is going to have to switch elementary schools, and he seems to be taking that in stride. We're hoping that the change will mean him having more friends he can see both at home and at school. Having three siblings is great, but he is kind of a middle child here, and he could really use some boys his own age to run around with. We know one family there already: someone I was in a bible study with years ago has three kids who are the same ages as my first three. Two of them are boys, and one plays soccer with Timmy. 

I'll leave you with some of the many pictures I've been taking with my phone, some of which I might have posted on Instagram, but I've taken social media off my phone for Lent. That doesn't mean I don't allow myself to be on it -- just that I can only access it from the laptop. It was too handy on my phone, and it was taking up every spare minute of my day.

Annie went on her first overnight field trip about a month ago. It was a couple nights at Sound to Sea at the Outer Banks with the rest of 5th grade. We spent a whole week talking about what she should pack. When Joey and I picked her up afterward, she had so much to say. She had sustained a lot of little bumps and scratches, bumping into things as they had walked around in the dark. But she'd had a great time. I think her favorite thing about the experience was the food. She talked about the food for two days. (A girl after my own heart.) Within hours of the buses' return, I received a text alerting me that one of the mothers had found lice in her daughter's hair. I had already checked Annie's hair, but now I treated it as a precaution, and let her suitcase sit in the laundry room for three days before opening it. Maybe one day I'll talk about our experience with lice this school year, but it's still too fresh, and I'm just not ready. We dodged it this time, though.

This little boy just loves throwing rocks and pine cones in the river, and he could do it all day. Sometimes he gets me one so we can throw ours in at the same time.

Early this week, photographers came to take pictures of the house that we are renting now, for the sale listing. Later that night, the owner texted us to thank us because she'd seen the photos and they were beautiful. She said she knows how hard it is to keep a house clean with kids around. It was so nice to get that acknowledgment, and I told her so. It may not be our house, but I have loved it like my own, and I for sure take pride in how the pictures turned out.

We had one good weekend of soccer games before everything ground to a halt.

She can still be annoying sometimes. Just yesterday she had one of Tim's flipflops, and she trotted off with it to the dining room, her preferred spot when she's in the mood to destroy something. (Those flipflops had been through two deployments and I should have just let her put them out of their misery!) She still does not know how to act around people besides us. But as she grows out of puppyhood, I like Willsy more and more. I love the way she positions herself just so, in the shaft of sunlight. I love how she sits and stares at me with those ears twitching this way and that, and how she wants to follow me if she hears me pick up my rosary in the afternoon and thinks I'm headed to the porch. She's a good doggo, and even though Tim doesn't admit it, he likes her too. He's the one who always makes sure she gets a little something in her bowl every night after dinner.

The middle school Battle of the Books competition was a couple weeks ago at the community college up the road. Delaney ran over to me and said, "Look, it's Daddy!" It took me a weirdly long time to finally notice he was on that poster and then I laughed. Tim's battalion adopted an elementary school about a year ago, and that picture was originally on the school district's Facebook page. He's famous!

We now have many more hours in the day for brother shenanigans.

Annie made green pancakes for lunch today.

My sister Anna texted us this picture of John-Paul and Rosie after Robert returned victorious from the grocery store. Not a minute too soon, it looks like.🤣

In the car yesterday, I heard R.E.M.'s "It's the End of the World As We Know It," and it's been stuck in my head since. I found myself singing it as I cleaned up the kitchen, and the kids were laughing at me. Tim is at work today, still touching all the doorknobs, no doubt. It should go without saying, but I am praying that everybody stays well and that this madness is over soon.

There's Something Going Around...

 February has been a big month for illnesses and maladies lately. I think Annie's 5th grade class has been hit hardest, with kids being home sick with flu, strep and lice or any combination of the above. We had a round of lice ourselves a couple weeks ago, our second in four months.  That's a whole other story. Otherwise it's been a chorus of coughs and sniffles for many days.

After keeping Annie home one day with a fever, I made the mistake of sending her the next day when it seemed like the fever was gone, and she said yes when I asked if she felt better. (I may have also been feeling pressure to have her counted present since she'd already missed a couple days due to lice and fever, and it's only the beginning of February.) That day her teacher became concerned and sent her to the nurse, who took her temperature (98.7) and sent her back to class. The next morning I took her to the doctor, where it was confirmed she had influenza A, despite the lack of fever (98.3 that time) or severe symptoms. She may not have had a fever or severe symptoms due to having been vaccinated, but she could still be feeling like crap and spreading the virus to others who are less protected. (As an aside, there is some interesting research out there that that calls 98.6 degrees, long considered the norm, into question. Since I take my temperature every single day, I know 98.6 is too high for me.)

Tim has had plenty of commentary about sickness and everyone's reaction to it. He scoffs at me every time I bring up the one time I got flu right after he left on one of his deployments (not confirmed!), and how miserable I felt for so long. Even once I was "better," I still wasn't really back to myself for several more days. This morning, after he said something minimizing illness, I decided that he should write a book called The Denial Approach to Wellness. The chapters would be as follows:

Chapter 1: You're only sick if you admit you're sick. Never underestimate the power of mind over matter.

Chapter 2: Take a Motrin and drink more water. That's pretty much the solution for everything. But in the slim chance that doesn't work...

Chapter 3: When you feel a scratch in your throat, go to the gym. Show it who's boss.

Chapter 4: Can't get out of bed? That's why God made Dayquil. I have seen him get up out of bed, where he's spent a night with fever and chills, take a Dayquil, and go to work. Apparently, the world stops when he doesn't show up.

I think that's a good start. All he needs to do is flesh out those chapters and maybe add a few more. He thinks there should be one built around the story of how his germphobe rack mate on the ship caught a horrible GI bug, while Tim who touches all the doorknobs was spared. The picture of him inside the jacket should be the same one hanging up at his battalion, which looks typical of these portraits in which no smiling is allowed, and the result is kind of an angry face.

Annie's class needs to get healthy again because they are all scheduled to go on a two-night field trip at the end of this month that eveyone has paid for by now, and it would really be a shame for anyone to have to miss out.

Now I'm off to go take another Motrin and drink a glass of water for whatever the thing is that I'm NOT coming down with.

Christmas 2019

It's 72 degrees today, the windows are open, I'm waiting for water to boil for my tea, and I am filled with gratitude for the wonderful Christmas we had in Cincinnati. We drove there last Saturday, and stayed with my parents till the following Saturday.

We got there with all of our Christmas preparations already finished, and nothing to do but relax and enjoy my parents' hospitality and one another's company. We enjoyed Anna and Robert's hospitality quite a bit too, with them being right around the corner. The weather was nice all the week, and the kids jumped on the trampoline. We sat on the front porch with tea and coffee, and no jackets. We all had dinner there once, and most nights we'd stay there till it was time for everyone to go to bed. We had so many laughs (and beers) in their living room.

A few months ago, Anna found this raggedy little dog on the street and took him home. She made a token effort to reunite him with his owners, but she and Monty Don (named after a famous British gardener) quickly became inseparable. I couldn't help but laugh the first time I saw him, with those wiry tufts of fur sticking out of his head and entirely absent from three quarters of his scrawny little body. Their best guess is he's a Chinese Crested mix. He was not treated well wherever he came from, so he was very skittish around us. He followed Anna everywhere and curled up next to her whenever she sat; but he also tolerated being carried around the house by three-year-old Lizzie. In spite of, or maybe because of his grizzled, threadbare appearance, along with those soulful eyes, I was so charmed by him. A sweeter and gentler creature I had never laid eyes on. I tried so hard to win him over! He would sometimes come to sniff my hands, but when I tried to pet him he'd back away. Better luck next time.

The babies are growing quickly. The reigning youngest is Sophie's little David, pictured above. He'll be a year in February. Sophie lives about 40 minutes away now, so nobody sees them as often as they'd like, but he and his two older brothers stayed at Mom and Dad's one day for a few hours.

Then there was this young lady, Anna's youngest, Evangeline or "Evvie", who turned one last week. She is the cutest, happiest little thing who would toddle out of the room and then back in, just to see our eyes light up at her.

Tim took the Big 3 to see the newest Star Wars movie the day before Christmas Eve. Delaney said it was the, but Tim, Timmy and Annie were kind of meh about it.

On Christmas Eve we went to Mass and then Scotty and Faith's. We ate delicious food, prayed a Rosary and sang Christmas carols by candlelight, opened presents, and took lots of pictures. 

We had a peaceful, slow start to Christmas Day, and then after everyone had gotten to enjoy their presents (iPads, among other things) for a little while, we took them to the lake trail down the street for fresh air and sunshine. Who needs a white Christmas?

The next day, we drove about an hour south to Falmouth, KY, to see Scotty and Faith's farm that they have been working hard to fix up since they bought it two years ago. It was a wasteland when they first saw it, an erstwhile tobacco farm with trash everywhere and a house inhabited by a tobacco juice-spewing old man who, to put it nicely, did not like to clean up after himself. But they had been searching for a couple years for a few acres of land on a river, and they had a vision. Now it is a getaway for hunting, fishing, canoeing, or four-wheeling; and they are generously sharing it with the whole family. It is a real curiosity to the neighbors who, not to disrespect, have couches on their porches and lots of lawn ornaments because in a place like that, it just doesn't matter. I'm sure they appreciate how much Scotty and Faith have cleaned up the property. It's been a labor of love for them, their kids, my dad, assorted siblings, and whoever else they could get to help--and they're not done with it yet. I love the farmhouse! When they get a fire going in there, it's going to be dreamy. It's so Chip and Joanna of them, the way they incorporated "junk" from the property into the finishing details. Stuff like old barn wood, temperature gauges, posted signs, and tobacco sticks all got a new lease on life here, and they give the place so much character. I might have been drooling at the sight of it all.

I was so sad to leave Saturday morning, but also a little relieved because it seemed like the longer we stayed, the less sleep we were getting. To make matters worse, Annie and Joey caught a crud that gave them runny noses sometimes, stuffy noses other times, and coughs all night long. Annie still has it, and Joey might too, although I think he just milks it so he can have another cough drop. Mom taught Annie to use a neti pot while we were there, and it gave her some relief, so now she's got her own on the way from Amazon.

I hope everyone had the best Christmas. I'm going to be peeking between my fingers to see what 2020 will be bringing us, with Tim's retirement this summer, moving away from my beloved North Carolina, and beginning a new life in Massachusetts. I've been the worst about documenting things these past several months, but I'll try to remember to share when I can if for no other reason, it will be a lot of fun to look back on one day.

Joey is 4!!

Behold, everyone, for I give you something rarely caught on camera: Joey's real smile, not the "Chandler Bing face" he gives anyone who aims a phone at him and says, "Say cheese!" Unfortunately he had some jelly next to his mouth when I took it, that I tried only somewhat successfully to fix with the Snapseed healing tool before deciding to give it to you in its unretouched glory. 

Joey has me several times, "I can't believe I'm four!" That makes two of us, Joe. I've told him time and time again that he's not allowed to get any bigger; he has to stay little forever. He just grins at me and of course does not listen.

His mouth has been growing faster than the rest of him. He is the king of witty retorts these days. Examples include:

Delaney: Can you pass the ketchup?

Joey: Yes, Your Highness.

Me: Did you toot?

Joey: That's what you paid for!

And this is the one that could get him in trouble: "That's not my problem." I think we all know who he gets that from -- his father. That is Tim's favorite comeback, and his response to pretty much anything he disagrees with.

I am so crazy about this little boy who just the other day, hugged me and said  "Woo-hoo!" when I picked him up from preschool, and who tells me I am his "best ultimate friend", that I can forgive him for almost entirely giving up his nap within the last couple months. I did not give up trying easily, but after a couple weeks of going through the song and dance of trying to get him to go down and stay down, I threw my hands up and said (no, just thought), "You win." But he has been such a bear without naps, the longer the day wears on. Sometimes if I lie down, he will get in bed with me and go to sleep. Other times he just jabbers in my ear incessantly or climbs all over me until I finally tell him naptime is over. On the days that he does nap, he sleeps quite heavily and then has a hard time settling at night. So we're kind of in an awkward phase of not-needing-but-still-needing the afternoon nap. I expect that will pass after another few months.

Most nights after initially going to sleep, he wakes up two to three hours later to go sleep with someone else, usually Annie. Then he started coming to our bed, and since he is so little and cute, we are loath to turn him away. He brings his own pillow, and tucks it right in the middle. For one of his birthday presents I gave him a Twilight Turtle like Delaney's, in hopes that it would help him like his own room better. It didn't. I enjoyed all the stars on my walls last night.

We have done absolutely nothing to move him in the direction of being nighttime potty trained. He continues to soak a pair of Paw Patrol training pants every night. I really need to get over my laziness and start training him the same way we did Delaney and Annie way back when. The thing is, I don't know if he'll be as compliant as the girls were with being woken up and brought to the toilet late at night. It took months of that, and then still having wet laundry in the morning, before it worked for the two of them. I think I might be a little afraid of the specter of a grumpy Joey being dragged out of bed. It is so much easier for us all to just sleep, and for our beds to all stay dry. Why couldn't he have made it easy for me like his brother did, and start spontaneously waking up on his own to go to the bathroom at night? Because he's not Timmy, and Timmy was an aberration, that's why. Before disposable diapers and "training pants" (a misnomer -- they've never helped train anyone) became so cheap, everyone had to do what it took to potty train their kids for day and night, the sooner the better. And as Joey might say, "That's not my problem."😆

I want to talk about something besides Joey's sleeping and toileting habits, so I had to start clicking through pictures to jog my memory. And, a-ha! This is one of my most recent and will be for all time, one of my favorite Joey stories. Tim and I ran the Turkey Trot this year, as we also did last year. The race takes place in our neighborhood, and the route takes us right by our house in the home stretch. Wouldn't it be something to see a kid or two outside cheering us on? Last year, nothing but crickets. So this time on Thanksgiving morning, we made sure they wouldn't forget. "Did I mention already that Daddy and I are going to be running right by this house?... Oh, I did just five minutes ago?" Well, someone was listening. At the end of the 5K, as we were running toward our house we saw a little figure in blue standing next to a race volunteer in our yard. It was our sweet Joey smiling and waving. Tim dashed over to give him a high five, then we ran through the finish line and turned back around right away to go squeeze that boy. And with that, he secured his place as our favorite child.

It makes me a little sad to say, after nine years in our family, the jig is up with Chippy, our Elf on the Shelf. What could I say in the face of his increasingly pointed questions that went something like: "Did you put him there?" "Can I touch him?" "Is he real?" He wasn't buying that it's "magic". So I gave him the truth.* "You're a smart boy, Joe. Chippy is just pretend. Yes, you can touch him." (Sigh) The Big 3 were very much into Chippy for years, but maybe that was because they were all so little? I don't suspect any of our other kids of spoiling Chippy for Joey, but I think that just being around them and all their talking and arguing over just about anything, has maybe made the logical part of his mind develop a little differently. I won't lie, though, I'm a little relieved. It was so hard to stay on top of moving that elf around every night, but I didn't want to stop if it was something Joey was still enjoying. If I were to offer any Elf advice to new parents, it would be, "Don't do it!!" That's what Tim tells all his Marines.

So far, he hasn't asked any pointed questions about Santa, and that's great. Santa is way more popular in our house than the Elf ever was, furthermore, he is real.

Joey loves school. His favorite things to do there include running around the playground with his friends Noah and Ethan. He can recognize his name and spell it. He does not like girls, and shies away from their friendly advances. He's getting better at counting all the time, counts things every chance he gets. Once a month, I pack him a lunch and he stays an extra hour for "lunch bunch". He really looks forward to that. He also asks me all the time when he's going to be the "snack helper" again, because the snack helper also gets bring something for show and tell. His turn for that comes once every month, he does not grasp the concept of time. As with everything else he looks forward to, he keeps asking me when is it going to happen, but doesn't understand my answers.

We celebrated his birthday a few days early because of this upcoming weekend being a busy one with half of us going out of town. He was one excited little man as we sang "Happy birthday" and he got ready to open his presents. Then Tim played a mean little joke on him that started with, "Smell this spot on the cake."😦 Poor Joe was in tears with cake all over his mouth and nose. I didn't take a picture, which would have added to his humiliation. A few moments later, all was well as he was opening all his presents. He even said something about it like, "Yeah, that was great!"

I know that everyone thinks their own child is the most unique, amazing, and intelligent creature to walk the planet, especially in these little years when they change so quickly. Even though he's our fourth four-year-old, I still feel this way about Joe. He makes us all laugh, melts our hearts on a daily basis, and completely wears this 40-year-old mama out.🤣 I am excited to see everything that age 4 holds for him.

______________________
*After all, we're bringing them up in the Catholic faith, which requires belief in things we can not see, and things that don't make logical sense, such as bread becoming the body of Jesus. In light of that, many would say it's never a good idea for us to tell our kids that Santa comes down the chimney and the Elf flies to our house every night from the North Pole. I would disagree. I think that pretending things is OK when they're little, and I cherish my own memories of looking out the window trying to see Santa's sleigh on Christmas Eve. But when they ask questions, they are ready to hear the truth, and we owe it to them. 

Halloween through the Years

2007 - Grafton, MA

2008 - Grafton, MA

2009 - Quantico, VA

2010 - New Bern, NC

2011 - New Bern, NC

2012 - New Bern, NC

2013 - New Bern, NC

2014 - Parris Island, SC

2015 - Parris Island, SC

2016 - Parris Island, SC

2017 - Okinawa, Japan

2018 - New Bern, NC

2019 - New Bern, NC